We open this episode with large dogs chasing a young girl through the woods near Winterfell. Ramsey--Lord Bolton's sadistic bastard son--is making sport of the chase with another girl and Reek (Theon) in hot pursuit. She stumbles into a creek, and is brought down by an arrow fired by the girl in Ramsey's company. Despite her pleas for mercy, Ramsey turns the dogs loose on her to finish her off. A broken Reek looks helplessly on.
Tyrion and Jaime are dining together, and Tyrion proposes a toast to the Lannister children--the dwarf, the cripple, and the mother of madness. Jaime bemoans his fate, he can't fight anymore and Tyrion tells him to command, and let others do your fighting. He suggests he train and learn to use his other hand, but Jaime is worried that people will know and take it as a sign of weakness. Tyrion arranges for Bronn to train him secretly and we see one of their sessions.
Lord Bolton arrives at Winterfell with his new wife--Fat Walda (Frey). He has Ramsey bring Theon in to see him, and is none too happy to see what Ramsey has done to him. Tywin has given him the north and he was going to use Theon as a hostage. He needed him whole. Ramsey tells him he has broken Theon, he will never betray them, he is much more useful this way. Bolton tells him he has placed too much trust in him, and he is not a Bolton.
In answer, Ramsey tells Theon to get a razor and give him a shave to show how he has broken him. He tells Theon to tell Bolton where Bran and Rickon are, and Theon confesses that he burnt 2 farm children, and not the Stark heirs. Ramsey tells his father, if they are alive the country will rally to them now that Rob Stark is dead.
Theon did not know this news, you can see him struggle with it, but he continues shaving Ramsey, a truly broken man. Bolton sends his men to look for the missing Stark boys, Theon says they may be in Castle Black with their half brother Jon Snow. Bolton sends Ramsey on a mission to prove himself to the family.
Tyrion and Varys take a stroll together, and Varys warns Tyrion that Cersei knows about Shea, and that she has been seen with him. He encourages Tyrion to send her away, but Tyrion says she won't leave, he has tried and tried.
Joffrey and Margaery are being presented with wedding gifts. Tyrion brings him a valuable book of stories of past kings, and tales of their wisdom. His grandfather Tywin presents him with a the second sword made from Ned Stark's sword. He names it Widow's Wail. He proceeds to chop Tyrion's book to pieces. (lol). He says, every time I use her, it shall be like cutting off Ned Stark's head all over again.
Tyrion calls Shea to his room and tells her he is afraid their friendship can't continue, there is a ship in the harbor waiting to take her to Pentos where she will be well cared for. He is a married man now. But Shea is not giving in, she pleads, swears she is not afraid of the queen or his father. Tyrion has no choice. To make her leave he tells Shea she is a whore, unfit to bear his children. He taunts her, how many men she has slept with. She counters back with all the women he has slept with and Tyrion concludes with how he has enjoyed all of them, and especially her, but now her time is over, and that Bronn will take her to a ship. She will have a comfortable life. When Bronn tries to escort her out, she slaps him and runs from the room.
Melisandre, Stannis, and his wife watch as 3 are burned at the stake. One of them is his wife's brother, Ser Axel. Axel cries--Stannis I served you well....but to no avail. The queen looks madly on and says--their sins are burned away.
Back at the castle, they are eating a spare meal. Stannis wife remembers a time when Stannis boiled books to make a soup for her, and shot 2 seagulls for a meal as well. They were the best meal she had ever had. She begins to complain about her daughter--she fears for her soul, she is sullen, stubborn, and sinful, she needs the rod. Stannis disagrees and tells her not to strike her. She wonders if Melisandre could go talk to her.
Melisandre goes to speak with Stannis' daughter and asks her if she watched the burnings. The girl wonders why Ser Axel was burned, he was so kind to her. Melisandre tells her she was a lot like her as a child and asks her about her religion. The girl tells her she has read the 7 pointed star and believes in the 7 gods. Melisandre tells her there are only 2 gods, the lord of light and the lord of darkness. The girl wonders about the 7 heavens and the 7 hells, but Melisandre tells her there is only one hell, the one we live in now.
In a snowy forest we hear heavy breathing and see a deer being brought down through a wolf's eyes. Bran is in the wolf dream and is awoken by Hodor and warned by Jojen and Meera that he must not spend too much time in the wolf body, it is too dangerous. He could lose himself there if he stays too long, he could forget everything. They continue their journey, and Bran sees a wolf by a heart tree. He asks Hodor to set him down under it, and reaches up to touch the face on the trunk of the tree, which propels him into a vision of the 3 eyed crow, a sword and a child in the forest. He hears a voice telling him to look for me beneath the tree, and then sees hundreds of crows flying towards him, a flashback of his fall from the tower, a voice says he sees us, dragon shadows over a city, a grand hall, and finally the tree again, and a voice saying north. Bran comes out of his trance and says--I know where we have to go.
Bells ring, we watch Joffrey and Margaery walking down the aisle from overhead. They go through the ceremony and are finally wed. Half hearted clapping and sarcastic remarks, and looks exchanged by all..
Bronn assures Tyrion that she's gone.
Olenna gives condolences to Sansa about her brother--how horrid, who would do that at a wedding-- and invites her to Highgarden.
A mournful song (the Rains of Castamere, uh-oh) brings us into the wedding feast. A bored Joffrey throws coins at the players to get them to stop. He rises and tells everyone the queen would like to say a few words. Margaery informs everyone that leftovers from the feast will be given to the poorest in town.
Prince Oberyn and Ellaria are enjoying the event--Ser Loras leers at Oberyn from a distance. He bumps into Jaime who warns him not to marry Cersei, that she will murder him in his bed.
Brienne gives her congratulations to Margaery and Joffrey perks up--you put a sword thru Renly. Margaery tells him no, Joffrey says too bad. Cersei goes after her as she leaves, she owes her gratitude for returning her brother to her. And then says to her--you flit from Renly, to Catlyn, to my brother....Brienne straightens up and tells her she does not serve her brother. Cersei says, but you love him. Brienne says, your grace, turns and leaves.
Cersei's next victim is Maester Pycelle who she catches fondling a serving girl. She sends him off to the kitchens to tell the cooks to give the leftover food to the kennels, countermanding the new queen's wishes.
Tywin and Cersei encounter Prince Oberyn and Ellaria. Cersei makes rude remarks to Ellaria about her birth, Prince Oberyn taunts Cersei about no longer being queen. He talks about how in some lands the highborn look down on the lowborn, how in his land the rape of women and children is distasteful. Tywin stoically listens and says nothing.
Joffrey calls for silence, clear the floor, there is too much amusement, a royal wedding is not entertainment, it is history. A large lion head opens and several dwarves dressed as the 5 kings come out and line up. It is a horrible characterization of each of the dead kings. Renly is riding a horse that looks like Ser Loras. Rob's rider is wearing a wolf head. Joffrey says, let the war begin. They proceed to fight a mock battle, Joffrey wins and does lewd things to the wolf head, to mock the Starks in Sansa's presence. Sansa is mortified, Tyrion, Margaery, Olenna are all visibly disgusted. Joffrey, at the end of the mockery wants to give a champion's purse to the winner but he says others challenge his reign, he says--Uncle perhaps you should go out and fight, Tyrion disagrees and believes it should by Joffrey. He mentions how Joffrey fought in battle, he witnessed it first hand. Joffrey stalks over and pours his wine all over Tyrion to which Tyrion replies--fine vintage, shame it is spilled.
Joffrey says--Uncle you can be my cup bearer, but as Tyrion reaches for the cup, he drops it and kicks it under the table. Tyrion hands it to him, and Joffrey tells him to fill it, what good is an empty cup-.-kneel, kneel before your king, kneel---I said KNEEL. Margaery's voice is heard--Look the pie! A huge pie is brought in, to which Joffrey takes his sword and slashes into it, releasing doves--most of them make it out alive...
Sansa and Tyrion get ready to leave but Joffrey has other ideas, Tyrion is his cup bearer. He is handed some wine, takes a drink--cough, cough, takes another sip, continues coughing. Margaery looks at him, and screams--he's choking! Olenna says-help your king! Jaime and Cersei rush to his side, trying to help him as he vomits wine and continues to choke.
The fool goes to Sansa's side and whispers to her that if she wants to live she must leave.
As Joffrey breathes his last, he reaches his hand out to the dais where we see Tyrion picking up the wine cup, all alone..Joffrey breathes his last, and Cersei's grief turns into instant rage. She screams out, looking toward Tyrion and wails--he did this, he poisoned my son, take him, take him.
