It's My Story and I'm Sticking to it

[Snowbird]

Here is the idea for this post.  Take a story that happened to you or someone you know.  Embellish on it by making it funnier or more dramatic if you wish but it has to be based on a real happening.  Feel free to comment on the stories of others. 

I will begin by telling about something that happened to me, although I will take the liberty to adding a little to it.

It had been a wonderful morning.  I had gone to watch the students at my granddaughter's school receive honor awards for the year.  Naturally I was very proud when my Lillie was called up for numerous award and clapped until my hands were red. 

The program ended and I began to walk down from the bleachers where I sat in the gymnasium to go find Lillie and give her a hug.  Things went smoothly at first as I was very careful as I took each step.  However, the last step was not as steep as the others and as I stepped onto the gym floor I started to stumble.  I was half stumbling and half running, trying to get my balance before I fell head first to the floor.  I traveled about a fourth of the way across the gym in this manner, wondering who was watching and ready to laugh, when I saw a very large man in front of me.  I know that he was the only thing between me and a fall.  I figured that as large as he was he would be able to withstand a short little barely five foot woman running into him.  But I was wrong.  As I hit his back with my full force down he goes with me on top of him. 

All of this story is true but the man did not fall but he did break my fall.  Thankfully, he was a nice man.

[bacali]

Funny, little story...
 But, as I pictured this... I could only think of how lucky you were that you hit his "back" when you went down...
Just imagine if you had hit him in the front and went down...then you would have been lying face to face, front to front on  TOP of him 
That would have been even more embarrassing.     

[Snowbird]

Oh, how embarrassing that would have been.  Luckily he stopped my fall and neither of us went down.   

[Merry Prankster]

The Prankster has a story somewhat related to Snowbird’s.  There is one difference---every word of this story is true.  The Prankster will submit to a polygraph if so requested.

In the fall of 1999 my son and I attended a Washington Redskins home football game.  The Skins’ stadium, FedEx Field, has a standard racetrack/bowl configuration with a fairly steep slope between rows of seats (30 degrees?).   There are no railings or barriers between the rows.

Midway through the third quarter the Skins received a punt and the returner broke free of the initial wave of tacklers and began running for a long gain, perhaps a touchdown.  Like everyone else in the stadium my son and I jumped to our feet and began cheering wildly.  While I was cheering I felt something brush my back and a giant whoosh! of air at my back as if something had fallen and barely missed me.   Once the play ended (a couple of seconds later) I turned around to see a man sitting in my seat.  He was well-toasted, holding an empty beer cup in one hand and his arms and legs were extended from his body at various angles.  He looked at me and asked “did he score?”  I replied “no, he was tackled at the three yard line.”  He said “Damn!” and then climbed back to his seat, which was two rows up and directly behind mine.  I looked at my son and asked “what the hell just happened?”  He shrugged his shoulders but a nearby fan who had seen the whole thing told me.  The toasted one had gotten to his feet and started cheering like everyone else.  Then he lost his balance, pitched forward, somehow did a somersault in mid-air and landed in my seat in a sitting position.  Apparently, no one was standing in-between me and the toasted one.  UNBELIEVABLE!  But true...

[ponytail]

Okay, my story is a true experience as well. When I was a young gal going to college in Montana, we would frequently hit the ski slopes on the weekends, only a 1/2 hour drive away. I was skiing with a friend that day--a friend with a wineskin. We would take the chair lift to the top of the hill, ski half way down, and then scoot in at the half way point to go up to the top again. Maybe it was a little too much wine, but neither of us looked to see if there was someone sitting in the chair lift coming up the hill (there was)--when we did notice, it was a mad scramble to get out of the way, with skis and legs flying everywhere! I am sure there were a few angry skiers that day--they shut down the chair lift for a bit, to make sure no one was hurt and we were safely out of the way....I don't think Bud and I ever went skiing together again!

[Snowbird]

MP, that would have been something fun to watch.  To bad someone didn't get a video on his fall.
Ponytail, I think you must have had a ball in college!

[Sergeant Prankster]

Okay, my story is a true experience as well. When I was a young gal going to college in Montana, we would frequently hit the ski slopes on the weekends, only a 1/2 hour drive away. I was skiing with a friend that day--a friend with a wineskin. We would take the chair lift to the top of the hill, ski half way down, and then scoot in at the half way point to go up to the top again. Maybe it was a little too much wine, but neither of us looked to see if there was someone sitting in the chair lift coming up the hill (there was)--when we did notice, it was a mad scramble to get out of the way, with skis and legs flying everywhere! I am sure there were a few angry skiers that day--they shut down the chair lift for a bit, to make sure no one was hurt and we were safely out of the way....I don't think Bud and I ever went skiing together again!

Ponytail, are you familiar with the song "The Days of Wine and Roses?"  If not, you can find it on youtube.  Now, I want you to sing the following line using the melody of the song:

The days of wine and moguls......

[ponytail]

Very familiar, and very appropriate! 

[bacali]

I had just turned 17 that Feb and started dating a boy the next month. Of course, we were going "steady" by the time we graduated H. S.
My mother loved him, my dad..not so much LOL... but,she coaxed my Dad to take us all to the shore one sunny day during that summer.( this is the beach for non Jerseyites).
So, my mom, dad, younger by 4 yrs , sister and us "lovebirds" went down the shore .
Back in those days...a girl never was all over her date, nor vice versa.... in front of her parents...especially her father. At least I never did...Oh my God... it just wasn't done.
Well, I went out in the ocean with my boyfriend and my sister and a huge wave caught the scoop in the back of my bathing suit and ........split the whole darn thing from the top to the leg elastic!! I was mortified.
I barely knew this boy and I was losing my bathing suit !!!!
And, I was....almost drowning with every wave that came crashing in.
BUT, I could not get out of the ocean ....like this...so I hung onto my boyfriend of 5 months.... for dear life.
I could see my Dad on the shore with no knowledge of this....with his arms crossed ...giving me the evil eye. I was all over this  fellow...but, he was doing his best ...holding my suit together and keeping me from drowning.
Now...mistake..
I asked my sister....to please go back to the shore and get me a sweatshirt... that was the 'only' way I was going to be able to get out of the water.
So, my nitwit sister....starts to go back to the shore and shouts...at the top of he lungs to my dad....
Barbara LOST her bathing suit!!!
Now you see people start to gather to watch .....us. Honest to God.
So... she gets the sweat shirt...and instead of holding it over her head to try to keep it from getting soaking wet...she drags it through the water.
Do you know how hard it is to put on a soaking wet sweat shirt whlle you are trying to stay above the crashing waves?
I will tell you...it's next to impossible.

*** just a footnote... we ...my steady and myself...dated on and off through college and he ...after one of the "offs"... proposed and...it turns out... yup, we got married and just celebrated our 47th wedding anniversary on Aug. 5th.
Guess he knew a good thing when he "saw" it.   

[Snowbird]

 -lollbacali,  That must have embarrassed you.  What did you say to your sister when you got out and what did your daddy say?

I had a similar experience but I was much younger, maybe nine or ten.  I was at church camp and we swam  in a lake.  They had a very high sliding board that you could go down and land in the water.  I went flying down it and to my horror when I came up the top of my bathing suit had come down around my waist.  As of course it had to be, a couple of the boys from my church were in the water and looking my way.  It took a long time before they stopped teasing me about that.  I was so embarrassed and ashamed!

[bacali]

-lollbacali,  That must have embarrassed you.  What did you say to your sister when you got out and what did your daddy say?


I honestly don't remember what I said to her...I was so exhausted.But, now my dad had a reason for me being all over this boy.
What I do remember.....
Those were the days when we wore bathing caps....to keep our hair dry...and mine ...forget it..
My hair was soaked..and I just remember lying on the beach towel just knowing I looked
like a drowned rat....in front of my boyfriend.  Never mind,. .that I could have drowned.

[ponytail]

Good story, bacali!

[bacali]

Of course, Santa Claus IS real !